Holy cow! It seems the Rashtriya Kamdhenu Aayog cancelled the Gau Vigyan exam! To
say that I’m disappointed would be an understatement. I was looking forward to check
out the questions and see how I would’ve fared in such a new and difficult, but
noble Nobel-worthy field.
Well, as usual, some morons from that “Gau”-lish
(Gau, Gaul, ghoul, whicheva suits you) outpost in the south, have apparently played
the spoilsport (Cow exam postponed).
They like being bulls in a china shop, especially in this age when China is bullying
us.
Don’t they know that an UGC exam is a
sacred cow? Did I get it wrong? A god is a sacred cow. A sacred cow is a god. It’s
all confusing. In this age, when governments and people can have a cow if someone
even thinks of thinking to make a god or politician joke, it’s better to leave
sacred gods and political leaders alone, at least, the ones still in
circulation. You are allowed to take digs, at the most, on extinct gods like e.g.,
Goddess Phaethusa, and Nehru. There are, of course, some countries where
comedians call their president as Putin’s c#*k su*ker (No apology from Colbert) or orangutan (Trump withdraws lawsuit against Maher)
and get away with it. But, don’t try calling your president or PM any of that.
Leave those sacred cows alone. Remember Mr.
Tharoor who famously miscowculated mallu literacy and said “cattle class,” which
turned out to be an udder failure, and he ended up listening to pontificating
mallus till the cows came home.
It’s all a load of bull. The government
shouldn’t be cowed down by this mallu “moo”vement, but should take the bull by the
horns and conduct that exam. It'd behoove them to remember that the sacred cow has been their perpetual
cash cow for decades now. A cow-ordinated response is the need of the hour, or
else, we’ll forever be behind Western bull-poop science, like a cow’s tail.
Gau, gobarment, gau.
